I am quite astute in picking up threads in the local media here in South Africa. A month or so back I noticed that our President, Zonked Out Zuma, had finally declined to attend a service in honour and in recognition of the life of our late ex-President Nelson Mandela at Westminster Abbey 3 March 2014 – the first foreign national to be given such an accolade. I pondered this.

Was Zonkie Mandela’d out? I mean, the service was supposed to have been scheduled earlier. Zonkie couldn’t make it due to the opening of Parliament so everything was rescheduled. Then, at the last minute he was supposed to be attending another event – twas the wedding of Robert Mugabe’s daughter (Head Honcho of Zimbabwe for the last 150 years!). Mmmm I thought. Tutu was in London, royalty, in fact some 2,000 people and dignitaries were there. When dignitaries above and beyond the credibility of our Presidency try to accommodate our Presidency – I keep saying Presidency because I am not sure that there is anyone actually there!- and then after much swopping (not wife or wives) of dates and diaries, to then decline must amount to rudeness beyond what we have ever seen here in SA.

Then, in the last few weeks, we have been reading about Mugabe’s shop-a-holic wife Grace being denied a visa to travel with old HM Robert Dictorial Homophobe Lets Ruin Zimbabwe Mugabe (HMRDHLRZN) to the very high profile, six months in the planning, special EU/African summit in Brussels. I didn’t know that they were allowed to travel there anyway due to EU sanctions towards him. A spokesman, according to News 24, said that many African leaders would not be attending due to the treatment of Mugabe’s wife. Mmmm. Since when is a Senile Head of State’s wife deemed so important that so many African leaders decide to boycott talks that embraced trade, foreign relations, international aid, international peacekeeping and the like?

My gut feel then was that Zonkie might pull out (no shower intended).

He did. He pulled out of important talks which, South Africa as a key economic player in Africa should have attended in my view. A South African Government statement said that Europe was trying to dictate the level of representation from participating countries. That was perceived as Europe re-enacting colonial instructions. We sent our International Relations and Co-Operation Minister. Zonkie himself was quoted as saying “I think that time must pass wherein we are looked (on) as subjects, we are told who must come, who must not come,” he told national broadcaster SABC “. Obviously issues close to the South African heart and budget must not be entertained by those who know not what a budget is!

South Africa cannot be an ostrich to strategic forums due to the inefficiencies and insecurities of our Zonkie. I ponder how South Africa was viewed going forward. If the international community decides to up a half finger (as a opposed to a full finger) at this time, we deserve it! I doubt anyone was trying to dictate anything that is not part of other international regional forums – this is just the way things are done, and while they can be improved and changed, sycophantic allegiances are not the way, especially as HMRDHLRZN is not exactly in the here and now, or the where and when, or the past and blast!

Hugely bad PR for South Africa, the declining powerhouse in Africa.

Is Zonkie the next Mugabe? How big is a fire pool? How big is a shower cap? How big is the amphitheatre? ‘Nkandla!’ ‘Ohwheretoliveattaxpayersexpense!’

The small man syndrome has no political platform these days – stand up and be counted and accountable or go buy Grace some shoes!